i missed you :: nils

Nils and Henri had been staying with Paisley for a little over a week now. The brothers were sharing one of the adviser's suites that were part of the Nadar estate. As I said in the rp between Paisley and Petra, Paisley hadn't actually gotten much of a chance to talk to either of the men because they had been keeping to themselves. Paisley had also been busy with overloridian things, so she didn't have time to go try to weasel them out of their rooms.

Today, however, Paisley had set aside her duties so that she could talk to them. Despite the short time that they had known each other Paisley had actually started feeling really close to them. Maybe it had something to do with their shared life/death situation.

Anyway, Paisley realized she missed them, and decided she was going to try to extract them from their holed up lair. So now she was going to knock on their door.

Knock knock. "Nils? Henri?" she called from outside.

The recent events involving their old friend Petra coming back into their lives as an enemy had left Nils and his brother both pretty shaken. Any time something like this happened, when their old lives caught up to them, Nils just felt freshly traumatized, like peeling off the scab from an old wound. There was just no escaping it, no matter how hard they tried.

Henri had wanted to leave again, to spare Paisley, but an infection of one of his injuries was preventing that, at least for now. So they stayed inside and kept to themselves, not bothering anybody. Nils had a tendency to withdraw from the world when things like this happened, and this was no exception.

He was by himself at the moment while his brother rested, sitting in the little living room area of the suite Paisley had been nice enough to give them. It was actually nicer than anywhere they had ever stayed, except maybe their original home, which he couldn't remember that well. He would forever be amazed at just how nice Paisley was to them.

He was scribbling down random thoughts in a notebook when there was a knock at the door. He tensed up momentarily before hearing Paisley's voice on the other side. He closed the notebook, walked over and unlocked the door, letting her in. "Um, hi Paisley," he greeted, a little shyly.

You go through a life-and-death situation with her and yet you're still nervous around her, Tanith commented, shaking her head.

Paisley was surprised by the quick answer at the door. "Nils!" she said, her voice a mixture of relief and happiness. It was good to see him! She hugged him gingerly, not wanting to make him more nervous than he already seemed.

"How have you been?" she asked with a half-smile. Obviously the night in Linius had been traumatic for herself and the brothers, but she knew that there would have been stirred up past feelings for both Nils and Henri as well. It was one of the reasons she had given them so much space. She didn't want to crowd them.

Nils was genuinely shocked when Paisley hugged him. He didn't think he'd been hugged affectionately by anyone whose name wasn't Henri in many, many years. He was so surprised he didn't even think to hug her back until she had already let go.

"I, I've been okay," he said, though that wasn't really true, standing aside to let her in so they could both go and sit down. He didn't want to tell her he wasn't okay when she had done so much to make him and Henri comfortable. "This place is really nice. I'm not sure I know how to thank you for letting us stay here."

When Nils led her inside, Paisley's heart lifted a little bit. He wasn't blocking her out. That was a good thing!

"You don't need to thank me at all," Paisley told him honestly. "These rooms have been sitting vacant for awhile now." Paisley had been working alone for a few years. All of the Nadarian politicians had sided with the old overloridian, and Paisley had been working on reestablishing how her eilemaiden ran.

"I'm glad to see someone is putting them to good use!"

Despite her cheerful voice, Paisley could tell that Nils was still feeling a bit uncomfortable. Paisley could only imagine what he was going through. It made her sad.

"Still, I wish there was something I could do for you," Nils said in a somewhat apologetic tone. Whether or not Paisley thought he needed to thank her, he would still be grateful to her for the rest of his life for all the things she'd done for him and Henri. Sadly, he wasn't sure there was anything he'd ever be able to do to repay her.

"There is something you could do for me!" Paisley said, suddenly coming up with an idea. "I missed you--so it would be awesome if you could go on a walk with me?"

Paisley was sick of being holed up in her estate, working on overloridian things and doing research. What she really wanted was a day of relaxation. And spending it with Nils would make it even better. But she knew Nils was nervous. She hoped he would be okay with going with her!

Nils looked at Paisley, slightly confused. Did she really mean that? That she missed him? "Oh, um, I don't know," he said hesitantly. Would that be okay? Going outside? The rational part of him knew it would probably be fine. The grounds were all Paisley's property, and it was pretty unlikely that anyone would be looking for them in an overloridian's backyard. But the other part of him just kept thinking what if, what if.

At the same time though, he felt oddly safe with Paisley. He'd seen the kinds of things she could do, and somehow in spite of what they'd gone through together (or maybe because of it?) the thought of being around her put his mind at ease a little bit.

He looked over at the closed bedroom door where Henri was sleeping. Would Henri be okay with it? Nils would definitely have to leave him a note so that he wouldn't worry when he got up. Although he would still probably worry.

He looked back at Paisley, whose face looked hopeful. "Actually...okay. Yeah. We can do that," he finally decided.

Paisley's face lit up. "Yay!"

Today was turning out to be a good day--something she needed after all the stress she'd been dealing with.

"Why don't you leave a note for Henri so he knows where we are, and then we can go out back to the gardens," she told him happily. She hoped Nils would be as happy to see the sunshine as she was! And she was excited to show him around the grounds of the estate. It was going to be great!

Nils ripped some paper out of his notebook and wrote out a note before sticking it to the door where Henri would definitely see it right away. Paisley just seemed so excited and he wasn't quite sure why, but it kind of made him happy. This was the first time he was really seeing what she was like outside of a mortally dangerous situation. "Okay, let's go," he said, letting Paisley lead the way out.

Paisley smiled. "It's nice, because I have patrols that work along the edges of the property," she told him as they exited into the backyard, "so I can come out here even in the middle of the night and not need to be nervous."

Not that she was ever nervous, really. She was more saying it for Nils' benefit. Maybe if he knew they were definitely safe he would be a little less timid.

She led him across the lawn to where the bushes lined the outside of the garden. She stopped and then turned around so that she could see his face.

Her gardens were some of the things she was most proud of. It was the most beautiful place she had ever been (though she may be a little biased). The colors and positioning of everything was just perfect. Besides exploring the jungle, this was what Paisley spent her time on. And she was so proud of it. :D

Knowing that there was apparently a security patrol did go a long way in putting Nils at ease. This was honestly probably the safest place they could possibly be.

When Paisley had said they were going to "the gardens", Nils hadn't really imagined anything much beyond a place to walk that happened to have plants in it. It turned out she had been talking about a huge, beautiful landscape, carefully crafted like a work of art. As he looked around at everything, he suddenly noticed that Paisley was watching him expectantly.

"Did you do all this?" Nils asked. After seeing Paisley build a house and a working boat out of scratch, he guessed he probably shouldn't be surprised at what else she could do. It was still pretty amazing, though. "It's beautiful."

Paisley smiled brightly when Nils called all of her hard work beautiful. "Thank you," she told him earnestly. It always meant so much to her when someone appreciated her work.

She led Nils into the garden, taking him down one of the paths. "I love coming out here and working with the plants," she said as they walked through the flowers. It was like she was born to be Nadar, which she supposed she was. But she had heard of some overloridians being upset with their settled eilemaiden--on the other hand, Paisley couldn't have imagined anything better for herself. She felt at home in nature. It was beautiful.

"What about you?" she asked Nils. "What do you do for fun?"

Paisley knew he had had a rough life, full of awful things and experiences. But there had to be something he enjoyed doing.

Nils actually smiled back at Paisley. She was just so nice, the way she smiled at him and thanked him. He had never really met anyone like her before.

"Oh, well, I guess I kind of like writing," he said after some thought. He had never really thought of writing as something he did for fun, per se. It was more of a way to get certain thoughts and feelings out without actually talking to anybody about them. But he did find it relaxing.

"Really?" Paisley asked, looking over at Nils as they walked. "That's awesome. I tried to keep a journal when I was little but it never really worked out. I could never remember to write in it." She laughed. "I'd find it under my mattress weeks later and try to write a bunch of entries all at once, but then I'd just get tired of it."

She reached her hand out and trailed it through some flowers. "What do you like to write?"

"Really?" Paisley asked, looking over at Nils as they walked. "That's awesome. I tried to keep a journal when I was little but it never really worked out. I could never remember to write in it." She laughed. "I'd find it under my mattress weeks later and try to write a bunch of entries all at once, but then I'd just get tired of it."

She reached her hand out and trailed it through some flowers. "What do you like to write?"

Nils listened to her talk about trying to keep a journal when she was little. Her story just sounded so nice and normal. It made him happy, knowing that Paisley had had such a nice, normal life. If anyone deserved that it was her.

"What do you like to write?"

"Just...things," he said vaguely, watching her trail her hands through the flowers. As if to clarify, he added, "Things I think about. Not like stories or anything."

"That's nice though," Paisley said thoughtfully. "It's nice to have something you like to do. Maybe sometime you can write out here while I garden," she said with a smile. She thought it would be a good idea for him to come outside more often--and this way she'd get to see him more too.

"And you're welcome to come out whenever, you know," she told him, suddenly wondering if the brothers had holed themselves up because they felt uncomfortable in her home. "Just to walk around or do whatever. Or maybe you'd even like to garden with me sometime?"

"And you're welcome to come out whenever, you know,"

"Oh, okay," Nils said, even though he knew there was no way he was ever coming out here by himself. Maybe with Henri, though, once he was feeling better.

"Just to walk around or do whatever. Or maybe you'd even like to garden with me sometime?"

"I don't know," he said doubtfully, looking around at all of Paisley's beautifully crafted flower arrangements. He didn't want to accidentally mess them up somehow, when she obviously had put so much work and pride into them. "I probably wouldn't be good at gardening."

"I'm a pretty good teacher," Paisley said teasingly with another smile. "But if it's not your thing, that's okay too."

She wondered how long the brothers would stay with her. Hopefully at least until she figured out what to do about Petra. She knew Henri and Nils would be safe as long as they were here--but the fact that Petra had found them in the wilderness made her nervous about their safety if they went anywhere else.

"It's not that," Nils said quickly, not wanting Paisley to think that he didn't want to do her favorite thing with her. "I'm just not good at very many things. I don't want to ruin anything."

I don't think she'd mind, Nils, Tanith said. She knew that Nils probably knew that too, in the back of his mind somewhere, but he had grown up in a place where mistakes--of which he made a lot of--were absolutely not tolerated.

"You can't ruin a garden," Paisley told him. The only way you could hurt a garden was if you didn't water or weed it. And Paisley would make sure that didn't happen because plants <3.

"And I'm sure that isn't true. About you not being good at stuff. Maybe you just haven't found your niche yet--but you will!" Nils probably hadn't had much time to do things he actually wanted to do. And, in Paisley's perspective, if he had been bad at the things he'd been forced to do, that was probably a good thing. If he had been too good at it he probably would have ended up like Petra.

Nils didn't know if Paisley was being honest or if she was just saying that to be nice, but either way he appreciated it. "Maybe you're right," he said, though he was doubtful. "I guess I could try, if you really think it's okay."

Of course she thinks it's okay, she invited you to do it in the first place, Tanith told him.

Paisley nodded, the smile still on her face. "I would love it if you tried."

And maybe next time they came outside Henri could come too. Nils would like that, she thought.

"Is Henri feeling any better?" she asked him as they continued walking. "I hope that the doctor was able to alleviate most of the pain." Henri had gotten an infection, despite Paisley's medicinal herbs, and had been resting the last few days. Paisley hoped that had been the main reason the brothers hadn't tried to come out to spend time with her, but she couldn't be sure.

"I don't think he's in a lot of pain," Nils said thoughtfully. Of course he also knew that Henri was very good at hiding when he was in pain. "I think he's more just frustrated that he can't really do much right now." Or maybe just frustrated that they were sort of stuck here right now. For the past four years they had pretty much been on the move constantly, and even though they were (hopefully) relatively safe where they were, Nils knew it was stressful for Henri to not be able to leave if they needed to suddenly.