learning how to do a thing [paislebutt]

Tanith had never seen Nils as happy as he had been lately in over fourteen years. While he was still never especially cheerful, he was actually starting to smile more often, and leave the suite on his own, and not have a mini panic attack every time someone he didn't know tried to talk to him. He was even starting to feel like here on Nadar, he actually had a place to call home.

Tanith knew that the two of them had Paisley to thank for that. Not only had she given them a place to simply stay, but she had opened her heart up to Nils and started a relationship with him. Nils still couldn't believe that someone as perfect as Paisley could find something in him worth loving, but the fact that she did made him feel worthwhile, and even a little bit confident.

That was why he had finally agreed to let Paisley teach him how to garden. Despite her assurances that it was incredibly easy, he had declined up until now, mostly because he was afraid of messing up the incredible work of art she had landscaped. But as he grew a little more sure of himself, he thought maybe he should give it a try. If anything it was a chance to spend more time with her.

"Paisley?" he called, wandering down the path that lead through the expansive gardens. She had just said to meet in "the gardens" but hadn't specified exactly where.

"Nils!" Paisley called happily from one of the center sections. Today was going to be great! She was going to do one of her favorite things with one of her favorite clio. "I'm past the fountain," she told him.

She'd just finished weeding and clearing a nice section of garden that needed updating. She'd figured this would be the perfect spot for Nils to start. He was nervous about messing up (although Paisley knew there was no way he could), so she thought maybe if he had a completely blank canvas it might make him a little more confident. She had cleared a spot for herself too, in the same section. She loved fresh dirt and a completely open space.

Nils made his was into the section and Paisley smiled brightly at him. She was so happy he'd come out, and even happier he'd finally agreed to try his hand at gardening. She couldn't wait to do this with him and see what he could create.

It was impossible not to return Paisley's smile when she came into view and Nils finally saw her bright, lovely face. Even with her hands, knees and clothing covered in dirt, she still looked perfect. In fact it almost made her look even more perfect, due to how happy and relaxed she was while doing something she loved. "You look really nice today," he told her sincerely.

Unlike the rest of the garden, this area was just a normal patch of bare dirt, although they'd obviously be changing that today. "So what are we planting today?" he asked. Paisley's garden contained all kinds of plants, from flowers to fruits and vegetables, both ordinary and exotic.

She smiled wider at his compliment. "Thank you," she told him, even though she knew she was all dirty and he was probably just saying that. She stood up and brushed her hands off on her shorts.

"We're gonna plant whatever we want!" she told him happily. "I took all the old stuff out so we could put whatever we wanted wherever we wanted." Some plants didn't grow well together, so she wanted to make sure they had complete opportunity to do whatever their hearts desired.

"I have a whole bunch of stuff waiting on the other side of these shrubs," she told him, waving a hand and watching the wall of shrubbery part like the red sea. A bazillion options waited on the other side. Baby trees, scores of different flower species, assorted other plants. All of them were suited to live in Nadar, and the majority of them would thrive if put together. She'd help Nils pick ones that wouldn't threaten others, if he needed help.

"Oh," said Nils, surprised at the huge assortment of different plants that Paisley had gathered. He walked a little bit closer to the walls of shrubbery to get a better look. She even had little trees among the collection. "Which ones should we do first?" He knew she said whatever they wanted wherever they wanted, but he felt like she'd probably come up with a better arrangement than him, so he wanted her to pick.

"Well," Paisley said, coming up behind him and speaking thoughtfully, "I usually plant the bigger things I want first, to make sure I have room for them. Then I arrange the smaller stuff around those, and design things however I want them to look." She walked over the the trees and larger, leafy plants and looked around.

"It just depends on what you want to use. If you only want the smaller stuff you don't really need to worry about what goes first. You can just plant what you think would look nice."

She wasn't sure what she wanted to do yet. There were so many options! It made her fingers itch with anticipation.

Nils wasn't surprised that Paisley had a process for choosing the layout of her garden. It seemed as though every plant in the garden had been put where it was for a reason, everything fit together so well. That was why Nils was still slightly nervous about ruining the look of the landscape that Paisley was so proud of.

He decided to wait to see what she'd pick first, and then follow her lead and kind of model what he did after her. He followed her as she walked around thoughtfully considering each option. "You know," he said. "I think my parents had a garden. Nothing like yours, though. Just a little one in the back yard."

Nils didn't remember a ton about his parents or old home, but every once in a while a little memory would come floating back. Nice, normal childhood memories that most clio would take for granted. He made sure to write them all down.

Paisley looked around, walking through the many plants she'd brought as options. She finally settled on a senna bush that would sprout yellow flowers once it was fully grown. She bent down to pick up the burlap bottom.

Nilby wrote:"You know, I think my parents had a garden. Nothing like yours, though. Just a little one in the back yard."

Paisley looked up at Nils from her crouch. "Really?" she asked. She loved when Nils shared stories from happier times. He didn't do it often--in fact, this was probably only the third or fourth time he had--but each time, Paisley felt like she was getting a little gift from him. He trusted her and cared enough about her to hand her these precious memories. The fact that he had shared this with her was more thrilling than the fact he'd owned a garden before. "I'm happy you told me that," she told him with a smile. She was so happy he remembered something like that. She hoped it brought him a little closer to his parents. "And I hope you'll like this one as much as that one."

"I don't think I cared much about that one to be honest," Nils admitted sheepishly. The more he thought on it the more little details came back to him. He actually smiled a little bit, thinking back on those days. "In fact I think me and Henri got scolded one time for running through it and trampling some of the flowers. We were little," he added hastily, as if he needed to justify accidentally destroying some flowers when he was six years old to Paisley.

He watched her pick out one of the little bushes to plant. Most of the young bushes and saplings hadn't flowered yet, and thus all looked pretty much the same to Nils. Paisley obviously had to know what they'd look like fully grown. "What's this one?" he asked, kneeling down next to a little sapling. Its label read "chaste tree," which he'd never heard of.

Paisley liked imagining little Henri and Nils running around in a garden, the boys and the plants equally full of life. She wished she could have known the brothers in their before, especially Nils. She liked picturing him a carefree child with crazy curls, untouched by the cruelties of the world.

"Chaste trees are beautiful," Paisley told him, picturing the one she had planted in one of the far corners of the garden. She thought momentarily about taking him back to show it to him, but decided against it. It was actually one of her favorite trees, with it's beautiful lavender flowers and tendency to attract colorful butterflies. She wanted Nils to be surprised with the outcome, once it bloomed. "They've got the prettiest flowers, and they're actually really good for medicine. I know the doctor's office here in Nadar has a grove of them in their supply."

"Really?" Nils asked. Over time he had come to find out that Paisley had at least one interesting little fact about each and every one of the plants in her garden, and there were tons of them. He wished he knew anything about anything, so that when she told him something new he could share something interesting back to her, but he was pretty sure she didn't want to know about the things he had learned growing up.

He picked up the sapling, and together he and Paisley walked back to the empty sections of the garden. He watched her contemplate the patch of soil for a moment, before she chose a spot and started digging. He walked over to a random spot and set the sapling down. "Is right here okay?" he asked, despite her many assurances that he could do whatever he wanted.

As they worked, he kept stopping to steal glances at Paisley. She was beautiful in everything that she did, but she was especially graceful in her element. He wanted to just go over to her, grab her and kiss her deeply. Unfortunately he was far too shy for that.

"Right there is perfect," Paisley told him truthfully. "Chaste trees need lots of sunlight, and that spot you picked will make sure it gets a ton."

Nils didn't know, but Paisley was stealing glances at him as they worked, too. Nils might not have been a settled Nadar, but watching him among the plants was something beautiful. She loved the way he stood over the plants he chose, looking nervous as he picked them out. She also loved watching him grow calmer as their time went on, when she could tell he wasn't stressing about which plants to choose, but was picking the ones he was interested in. He kept asking questions, but Paisley could tell that gradually they became less of "I have no idea what I'm doing please help me" to actual curiosity.

She paused in her work for a moment to watch Nils brush some dirt off a plant's leaves. He was so tender with the plants, his hands so soft with them. Why was it that every single thing he did made her fall for him even harder? As she was watching, Nils glanced over at her, catching her eyes on him. She blushed for no reason and looked down, her hands sifting dirt. Why did she feel so embarrassed, watching him? Hadn't they kissed? They'd even told each other they loved each other.

She looked back up, hoping that he was still looking at her. He wasn't. She felt a flutter of disappointment, but then decided there was no reason for that feeling, either. She got up and, wiping her hands on her shorts, walked over to where Nils was crouching. She knelt beside him, looking at his work.

"This all looks amazing," she told him sincerely. Whether he knew it or not, Nils was actually doing a really good job deciding where things should be placed. He was using the information he got from Paisley to truly think about what plants would flourish together.

Nils smiled when Paisley complimented his work. A small, incredibly unfamiliar feeling grew in his chest. Pride? He had managed to create something that he was happy with, and even more importantly, that Paisley was happy with too. He had done something right. "Thank you," he said. Tanith would have smiled too, if coyotes could smile. The Nils of just a couple weeks ago wouldn't have even believed the sincerity of Paisley's compliment, and now he wasn't even questioning it.

He turned to look at Paisley at the exact moment that she looked at him, their eyes meeting. She was so close now that he couldn't resist leaning in to kiss her, a little more softly and hesitantly than he really wanted to. To be completely honest he wanted to do more than just kiss, but once again, far too shy to even bring that up.

Paisley was just starting to smile when Nils leaned in and kissed her. It was one of those shy, tender kisses that she would never get enough of. Soft and sweet, just like him.

When he pulled away, her smile only grew. Every time they kissed it reminded her that this was real. This man in front of her, who seemed so broken at first, was this brave, intricate soul who was coming back to life. Nils kept wanting to learn from Paisley, but in moments like these, Paisley knew there was so much to be learned from him.

"I love you," she told him, reaching in for another kiss. "And I love our garden." They kissed a third time, but this one was deeper, leaving behind the gentle sweetness from before. More passionate, electric. There really was something about being surrounded by nature and kissing the man you were hopelessly in love with.

Nils probably would have replied that he loved Paisley too, but before he could she was kissing him again, deeper, more like how he'd wanted to kiss her at first. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer to him, his mind going blissfully blank. It was an amazing feeling, being so intensely close with someone who he cared about, and who actually cared about him too. To be able to do this because he wanted to, not because he had to.

They pulled away from each other again, breathless, though Nils kept his arms wrapped around her. "Paisley," he said quietly, a little smile on his face, running a hand through her long hair. This didn't seem real, like it was all just too good to be true. "I don't think I've ever been this happy before." He had a place that felt like home, and a woman who loved him, and a renewed sense of self-worth that he'd lost a long time ago. All things he never thought he'd have in his life, things he hadn't thought he deserved.

A chill ran down her spine at his words. It meant so much to her that he was happy; happy here, happy with her.

"I don't think I have either," she admitted to him. She'd never been in love before. And in the last few years she'd put so much time and energy into Nadar she hadn't been able to form real connections with anyone even on just a platonic level. "I'm just so happy you're here."

The brothers could have washed ashore anywhere. Amelia had many islands, any of which the currents could have taken them to. And fate had been so generous in letting her be the one to find them. She remembered Nils, struggling to keep his brother standing as they scrambled across the rocky eastern shore. Strong, even then.

"I wouldn't even be here if it weren't for you," Nils told her, leaning down and placing a soft kiss where her neck met her shoulders. "I'd be dead, or worse." Not exactly the most romantic thing in the world to say at this moment, but it was true. Without Paisley, even if they had somehow miraculously survived by themselves on the beach, he and Henri would be back with their captors this very moment. While Nils would never allow himself to die and leave Henri alone if he could help it, he had to admit it might be a kinder fate than ending up back with them.

Paisley blushed. Nils thought too highly of her. She refused to think about his last statement. He wasn't dead, or worse, and that's all that mattered. And soon enough the horrible clio that had ever made Nils fear something worse than death would be caught and dealt with. Then Nils and Henri and Petra would really be safe.

"I love you," Paisley said, easing away from the topic of Nils' past. It wasn't that she didn't want Nils to be able to open up to her, she just wanted Nils to have a good day today. She wanted him to enjoy his time out in the sun, breathing in the fresh air. He tended to get choked up and tense when he thought about his kidnappers (not that Paisley blamed him, obviously), and she wanted to avoid that today. She picked up one of his dirty hands and kissed each finger tip. "I love all your fingers, too!" she smiled a silly grin at him.

Nils was a little bemused at Paisley's sudden silliness, and didn't respond right way as she kissed his fingertips. "I love you too," he finally told her, taking one of her hands once she was done and intertwining it with one of his. "Everything about you." He still didn't understand why Paisley loved him back, but he was so, so glad that she did.

He ran his thumb over the back of her hand. Despite being dirty, her skin was so soft and smooth. The palms of her hands, though, were more rough and calloused, undoubtedly from her gardening work. It suited her, how she was both kind and gentle, but also tough and strong. "Thank you," he told her, kissing her knuckles. For everything. "For teaching me how to garden. I can see why you love it so much."

"Well thank you for being such a perfect pupil," Paisley said with a grin. She had known he would pick it up. He was so soft and kind and that was exactly what plants needed. "This is going to be the most beautiful section. The..." she trailed off, thinking for a few seconds before finishing, "...Nilsley garden!"

She looked around at all their hard work: the soft upturned dirt, the assortment of plants they'd spent their morning fitting snugly into place. It was beautiful even now, without the flowers that would eventually blossom.

"Oh," Nils said, flushing very slightly, unsure of how to respond to Paisley's praise. The perfect pupil? Most beautiful section? While he was, for once, actually proud of the work he'd done, she couldn't really mean those things. She was just saying that, of course. "Your half looks better than mine, I think."

He did let out a small, quiet laugh at her name for the garden, "Nilsley." Their names combined. He liked it.

"No," Paisley corrected, "they look beautiful together." It made it so much better that this was theirs, that it was something they had done together. Everything didn't have to match perfectly or be color coordinated to be beautiful. "It's going to be amazing once the flowers grow." Life was so awing in that way. Plants were incredible--the way they came to life and grew from the dirt, reaching for the sun.

She squeezed his hand lightly. The garden was amazing, but this? The hand holding and the kisses and the man she shared them all with? It was beyond words.

Nils put his arm back around Paisley and squeezed her shoulders slightly as they sat together, covered in dirt and sweat, feeling more relaxed and content than he probably ever had. They talked a little bit more, about plants and each other, but mostly just sat in a comfortable silence until they decided to clean up and return the next day.